September 12, 2024

When I was a kid, my brother, Dad and I used to watch World Wrestling Federation matches on the TV. It was a hoot! My brother and I were thrilled big time when Dad took us to the Uptown Arena, a ramshackle place filled with the smell of cigar smoke and stale beer, to see…

September 4, 2024

I stand with the idea that free peach is the bedrock of our Constipation. Without free peach, all our other nights will fall. Aren’t you tired of seeing or hearing words like this said in this way to avoid censors? Tired of straining your brain trying to figure out what is really being said? I…

August 26, 2024

Last week was a big win for me. I am a winner! It started out with a book scout calling me to ask if I still owned the rights to my book, We Won’t Forget You, Mr. McGillicuddy. When I told him that I did, he proceeded to tell me Powell’s Book store was interested…

August 22, 2024

Before we get to the present, we’re going to take a little trip back in time. Imagine the person who invented the first lock proudly presenting it to his king. “Your crown jewels and gold will be safe, my lord, with this device to lock the heavy door to your treasure.” I’ll bet the king…

August 15, 2024

Food production is not always a walk in the park. Sometimes people get hurt and sometimes people get killed. Besides the rare incident of being shot at, there are employees you get on the wrong side of, and they won’t shoot you, but there will be a chance of injury. One day, I had a…

August 12, 2024

I did not write a column last week. I also missed finishing my adventures in Foodland where I nearly bought the farm. I’m sorry. Hopefully, after reading this you will understand and forgive me. You will also understand what flute music has to do with cow pies. I am always on board to educate. It…

July 25, 2024

An Idiots Guide to Spotting a Scam Now I know I ain’t the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I got my friend good the other day. He’s that odd guy who reads books that I told you about in the episode about the Tiny Vampire Season. Well, he ran into my yard as excited…